I Don’t Want to Do This

I created this blog a month ago, but haven’t been able to get myself to post anything. Mostly because I don’t want to write. Well, mostly because I don’t want to write and then have it suck. My biggest personal fear is to be considered a mediocre writer. Next in line is being kidnapped and tortured. I’ve successfully avoided being labeled a mediocre writer by employing my brilliant strategy of not writing. I know, pretty smart, huh? And so far I’ve successfully avoided being kidnapped I think mostly by obsessively worrying about it. As we all know, obsessively worrying about something totally keeps that bad thing from happening. Another brilliant strategy of mine.

But now that I’m sober and shit and facing all my fears and whatnot, I’ve decided to go ahead and put myself out there, except, I haven’t really done that yet. So here I am.

There’s a lot I want to cover and I don’t really know where to begin. Do I start with my fucked up yet comical childhood? My angsty evangelical teen years? My life as a child bride? (I was 25, but still.) Or do I start with my slow descent into alcoholism beginning as a teenage party girl and ending as a suburban mom wino? Maybe I start with my self-help obsession and stint with an almost cult seminar company? I could just blog about my mom for the next 40 years…

I hope you can bear with me while I figure out this whole blog thing. I think it will be worth it. Maybe.

XOX